I think for your (you, Dan, and your children’s) health and well-being, it is likely best you all don’t have contact with his parents. They sound rather abusive and toxic. Alas, not everyone has great, loving, understanding parents. I would be concerned his parents would attempt to poison your own kids against one or both of you. I’ve known people in very similar situations who had their kids taken away by said grandparents after caving to giving them visitation. Once they had regular contact, the grandparents pursued legal angles in order to get custody. At the very least, they made things worse for the kid’s parents. They too poisoned their grandkids against their own parents. It was a horrible situation for everyone involved, except the toxic grandparents of course. People assumed because they were elderly, they were sweet and innocent. Even toxic people age out.

I understand why you don’t let his parents see their grandchildren. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad about making decisions to keep toxic, argumentative relatives away from your children. Some people don’t understand what toxic family dynamics are like. But, not everyone is raised by loving, supportive, respecting parents. I wish you the best of luck.

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Technophobe Who Codes | UX Generalist | Freelance Writer | Egalitarian-Feminist | True-Crime/Forensics Enthusiast

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