I tried to plan a “simple” wedding once. Then I learned, the bride and groom are not so much planning a wedding as they’ve left themselves wide open to unsolicited advice, family drama, and bullshit. I wanted to elope, but my soon-to-be-husband at the time insisted his family had to be there. They weren’t paying for anything and I couldn’t understand why we couldn’t go somewhere (read: outside of the US), get married, and celebrate when we got back. I was in school full-time, working full-time, and trying to plan a wedding that seemed to be suiting what everyone else wanted. I hated every damn second of the planning. His entire family made it as miserable and expensive as possible.

Example:

I told the men attending they didn’t need to concern themselves with getting tuxes, that suits or dress clothes were fine. This didn’t seem to suit a couple of people who insisted they wanted to don a tux for the occasion. F*

The same would be true for the ladies, a dress was fine, nothing too fancy, as it was going to be a small, intimate affair. No flower girls, no bridesmaids, etc. Well, my inconsiderate mother-in-law didn’t like that and behind my back told her granddaughters they would be in my wedding. WTF? I told their mother they didn’t need anything new to wear, just a dress they already owned was fine. Nope. My would-be sister-in-law insisted we pick out something more formal. So, I wasted a day out of my busy f*ing schedule sitting around David’s Bridal, watching two girls acting like pissy brats as they tried on clothes they hated. Later EVERYONE bitched and moaned about having to spend $ on tux rentals and new dresses. Hello! YOU were the ones who insisted on it!

Knowing what I do now, I should have walked away from the entire ordeal because when people start making demands on someone on THEIR wedding, it causes drama and you can’t make everyone happy. Ultimately, my divorce a few years later was faster and cheaper than my wedding. Should have taken the madness of the wedding planning as a sign.

My advice, do what you want when it comes to celebrating holidays, birthdays, and weddings, etc.

Technophobe Who Codes | UX Generalist | Freelance Writer | Egalitarian-Feminist | True-Crime/Forensics Enthusiast

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