The GL will go into detail about something that happened between you, but will put a negative spin on it to benefit them, and will usually leave out key elements of the interaction. They do this to discount you and to prove their own point over a conflict. This leaves you thrown-…
Like, “Well she was upset with me and yelled at me” but the GL leaves out the detail about how they are the ones who incited the incident in the first place.
My mother did all sorts of awful things — too many to dredge up here. But whenever I attempted to confront her about them, instead of apologizing or taking responsibility, she would cough up a few fake tears and call me a bully. My brother would storm into the room and suddenly I’m the a**hole who is making my mother cry. Let us forget that I am the wronged party but all she had to do was cry for a little sympathy and in rode her muscle, my brother, her bouncer. I was never given an opportunity to have my say without being cut off and having my feelings completely disregarded. I was just always wrong, no matter what, and it was especially frustrating to have my brother side with her even when it was obvious I had been the wronged party. Instead, he would verbally or physically threaten me to back down and leave her alone. He was the perfect flying monkey for that monster.