Of course he was. I’ve had at least 3 men in my life who were very vocal or who made efforts to sabotage my personal success and who made me feel more like a living wallet than a partner. Each in their own way would make a point to interrupt me in the middle of something work-related or educational (as though forcing me to choose between keeping the peace with them and making them feel more important than my work). Once, I asked my ex-husband to chip in on helping me cover the cost of our insurance and cell phone bills. His response, after months of asking, was, “You should have thought about that before taking on the bills.” Suggesting that since I was the only one working between us at the time, my job providing the coverage he was using and because I made more, it was my responsibility to keep him in a life he’d become accustomed to. He spent his days lazily paying video games and expecting me and his parents to supplement his income instead of keeping a job. Shortly after that, we got a divorce. I finally accepted the truth that he was never going to have my back unless my wallet was in my back pocket.