THIS is why having a prenup, even when you are essentially poor, is a valuable investment. I had one because I owned property and wanted to keep it. I had relatives living in a house I owned and didn’t want to risk losing it in the event of a divorce. We kept our financial accounts separate. We also did not have children. So keep all that in mind. Having one meant my divorce was cheaper than my wedding dress (~$1,000). Officially, it took less than a week; from the meeting with the attorney to the signing of papers. Then we just had to wait out the judge’s signature, which can take a couple of months (I had no control over). It was as fast and efficient as a divorce can go since you have to wait for the official signage from the court.

When I left my ex, who essentially used and lied to me, was something of a shallow narcissist, etc. I was thankful I had it. One huge flag, he stopped working. He just decided one day he didn’t want to work and stayed home and gamed because he felt like it. Taking no personal responsibility for the stress HE put on our relationship. Again, stopped, not unable to work or fired, but didn’t want to work — and I was forced, for a while, to financially deal with things on my own. Then, he’d have the gall to call me out on my bad mood when I’d get home after a long day and find him sitting in the same gaming chair, gladhanding his keyboard. “I don’t understand why you are in a bad mood all the time. You should work on that.” Excuse me? As though his actions or lack of actions had no part of it. I was working a full-time job as well as a part-time one. He wasn’t working at all and sponging off everyone around him. And, he didn’t feel the need to cook or clean. So I might as well have been on my own since I was doing it all anyway.

Had I not had a prenup and tried to leave him, I would have likely been obligated to pay him something for a few months while he sat on his lazy a** and collected my hard-earned dollars.

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