Yeah, some doctors — legal or not — will outright refuse to do the procedure unless her husband agrees to it. Sometimes it is the policy of the facility itself and not an actual law. It is part of this very antiquated “she’s my property” idea like his wife is chattel or something and isn’t free to make decisions about her own body. Even then, a doctor may resort to lecturing, suggesting she’ll regret it or change her mind, therefore he/she won’t do the surgery.
Also, in some states, they require a woman to endure a psych eval BEFORE she is ALLOWED to have any type of sterilization process performed.
I’ve known plenty of women, myself included, who were met with a lot of lecturing and belittling at the hands of doctors when discussing long term pregnancy prevention. Both women who don’t wish to have kids or any more kids are met with doctors who dismiss or discredit their decision. We’re made to jump through hoops. Whereas, (most) men don’t get the same treatment. At least none of the ones I know or have had discussions with about this topic. They don’t have to get a wife to sign off, or take a psych eval, or endure a lecture about “being sure” or “regretting the decision” so they (Dr) refuse to do it. But they are still happy to take your co-pay for the wasted visit to their office.
I’ve personally had doctors obfuscate medical and legal details in hopes I would tire of the hurdles and stop asking. It sucks when people push their own agenda on you when all you are trying to do is be responsible and do what you feel is best for your life, not theirs. They are a doctor. Patients are coming to them, asking for help. If a grown woman wants to have her tubes tied because she doesn’t want kids or doesn’t want more kids, I say more power to her. She shouldn’t have to get permission from her partner or get a lecture challenging her like she’s inept.